"I'm sorry Tim, I parteed last night." A phrase that struck me down. It wasn't so surreal to feel off and composing myself for a reason that I am inside the office but I have to, I can handle it professionally.

 But I was terribly wrong, as the phrase sank in, I slowly felt the vibration of anger trying to wrap my whole thinking, eating my thoughts alive. A re-bounce of words that I thought it wouldn't affect me professionally, yet I was siege. I was conquered by the emotion, an anger that could eat me alive if I would not hold on to the fact that I am inside the office and so this type of rant is a no-no to be entertained. Another beep, another piece of words that were running in and out my mind. The lift of angst and frustration are getting heavier.

Sir, I need to go to Quezon City for my class. Telling my boss, letting him know and feel that I need to help this kids to learn, yet deep inside it's an outrage, a blare of remorse. I wanted to explode, I wanted to say horrendous words, I wanted to rant. But it seems the heavy emotions killing me, stopping me from blaring a word.

I freezed. I lost my control, I feel off.

I do understand that I don't have the right to say and to stop you from parteeing. I know I don't have the right to tell you to partee with me exclusively. I know i don't have the guts to tell you I find you interesting and I wanted to be with you forever if the world allows. All my qualms are adoration for you, saying stuff that I seldom  blab to others. Appreciating and protecting you. Okay we both know we have 10 years gap- but I told you it doesn't matter. I told you I don't care about age and stuff.

I don't know if this pain is bearable, but I know for sure I am going to get this over.

Freezing Point, I fell Off..

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  1. I think you need a time out..

    chill, relax, go somewhere :)

    1. where is that somewhere ba? sa bahay mo? hahaha


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