It's been 6 years now when I had decided to move out and have life of my own, to see what's next on this life I have. Buckling up myself was  best decision I've ever come up. To move out is like heaven coming out from the hellish place of scrotum sack where dreams remained undiscovered, where fear acted as the core of my daily skirmish. The shining armor on the house not a home is the boss, lawless violence and unpredictable thing to happen as the days unfold. While learning everything, the tricks, coping with fear and to discover  how it's gonna be like being out there, lurking freely. Nerves not shaking to the fear of being scolded or worst would be spank, slap and be tortured.

Your decisions should be followed, your word feared by everyone in the house not a home. No clamor, no blare, those rants should be kept  unsaid and those raves should be hidden in the closet securely. Looking back on those days, I felt unstable and  anytime soon I would  collapsed on the chair where I am sitting right now

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It's feels like heaven when I found your text in my phone, your message makes me ecstatic every time I received it. I always smile and feel intense thinking of you, it is like the whole universe colliding and connives with what I'm feeling. It is not good to assumed you loved or liked me, but this feeling of intensity made me settle slow down- I might get hurt at the end of the game. Oh, I'm not considering that you are playing games with me. Trying to makes me secure and feel that you are mine, no I am not thinking of it. I just learned so many things as I grow up.

Your message helped me feel good about myself, thought  your words are overdone. But heck I don't care if you are trying to caught me cackling in my room, once you heard my voice doing so with a huge slam I would really watched out next time. You might be just next door. So staring from now, I am trying to control my emotion if your message will soon arrived.

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 Women dreamed of a fairy tale wedding, enchanting with long white silk covered with  diamonds and precious stones, the motion-less yet demands attention  walk, that brings grace and elegance to their precious moment.

The glance of love and adoration. The vow that binds the two hearts. The promise to love each other forever- til death do us part..

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No, i am not. Today the rain is flowing smoothly on my skin, its coldness made me think to blog about feelings and how did we get over on things that made us broken as hell and hurt terribly. As we all know, the word pain is inevitable. It is something that most of us shunned. But as the world evolves the chances of not getting hurt either by love or what ever it might be- still we get hurt.

What's the gist of this post is, all the things we faced has its corresponding happiness and failure. When we maximized the things to make us happy we tend to get rid of pain. We tend not to look at the brighter side of getting hurt. But sooner or later we are hit and hardly coping with it.

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I am terrified, running on the aisle of nowhere,
Feet burned, sick and tired.
I can hear you screaming, with fear and anguish
Tired, tired, tired eyes spells loneliness...

Oh men, things get better and better to my friend Kenneth, who was raised in Mindanao, won the Man of the Year 2010- and now making waves in Manila as the newest hot male group.

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As I am crossing the bridge of life, I noticed I have gone through such troubles, success and failure. My life had been through good and bad times. Being the youngest of the brood, I am not quite lucky- I was abused physically, mentally, emotionally and verbally. Those four major major struggles I have been dealing nowadays. I wasn't yet free after relocating myself after 16 years of  facing those morbid stuffs. It is hard to figure out. But I never have any grudge against my parents who raised me well- I should know that there were things that I screwed up doing, and there were also things that they cannot provide.

Growing up with the imbalance world as i perceived. Unfair as I understand, cruel as I observed. Ruthlessly devoted to make me sick, tired of the situation that once and for all, a tot not deserving to faced those.

As this gruesome upbringing started to stirred up on my mind, I became aggressive on coming out and leaving from this horrendous life I have. I never dreamed to be punished, I never dreamed to be controlled with unruly way of parenting. Saying a word would end up eating my blood, speaking and justifying would end up full of patches- that all I can say " I will take revenge!"

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I just find this signage amazing. Filipinos Alert!